Patient or Patience

"You're waiting on a miracle" my doctor replies.
I nod through my tears, wiping at my eyes.
He gives me a referral to a specialist doc,
I leave his office numb from the shock.

"I need to talk to you," I text my Dear.
Dreadfully I share what we don't want to hear.
Our lunch is spent in tears and embrace.
My heart aches, longs to erase

The long, lonely years of empty arms.
The painful smiles and put on charms
For others more fortunate and blessed.
Who got their baby with little distress.

The comments and suggestions unsolicited came.
The painful remarks, pointed fingers of blame.
The ignorant and uneducated speaking "wise"
All these and more brought tears to my eyes.

Now I stand at a moment of choice.
I sit and pray quietly, seeking His voice.
I pray for His comfort and strength
To guide me down this path of great length.

He will not fail me, He will not leave me.
Thou I must not doubt, I put my faith in Thee.
Give me Hope as I try to know Thy Will.
Patient or Patience, in my motherhood quest to fulfill.