Holding on

Toostie has been holding on these days. I've been holding on emotionally at times. It's been a challenge but aren't challenges good for us? I'm also guilty of holding on to some not so good things like anger, resentment, self-pity. These types of emotional ball & chain issues are natural challenges we all deal with. However, these are challenges that are extremely unhealthy for us. So, how do I purge the unhealthy challenges? I know that there is only One who has the power to take the challenge and replace it with conviction to do right. He will not pry it from out closed fist. No, we must go to Him and ask that He take what we've already placed at His feet. We have to let go first.

Second, we have to continue in humility and love toward Him. We must ask Him yo forgive us and strengthen us. This becomes the challenge of holding on to our struggle. Our natural man trait is not accustom to holding on in faith to that which is so difficult to identify unless we are still and quiet. He will help. We need only Ask.

Bouncing Back....

Tootsiesroles has been on vacation for too long! I'm ending my hiatus right now. Mind you, I, Tootsie, have not been on vacation, just been distracted from my blogging. I'm here to get back on track...

So, what's new with Tootsie? Well, not much. I did however have the most wonderful time with BB and his amazing family at the "happiest place on earth" aka Disneyland. Wow! That was a FUN time! I can't wait to do it again. :) Thanks BB for letting me tag along.

As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints I'm excited that my Conference edition of the Ensign has arrived. I have two copies, so I can really get into studying, marking, and feasting upon the words of our living prophets. I encourage you to get a copy of the May 2010 Ensign and read and study the messages of April's General Conference. You can get them online too at www.lds.org if you'd like to browse without the paper.

I'll be back again soon. Too long without writing has left my mind and creative talent dull. I'll see if I can't sharpen it up a bit.

My emotional and spiritual reserves have been  improved greatly this weekend. I'm so thankful for the life and love of Jesus Christ.  I hope the joy and miracle of Easter has been strengthened in your heart this holiday weekend. As a Latter-day Saint I feel truly blessed to have listened to the voice of a prophet and many others who were directed by God in their messages.

Clarity in the fog

I reminisced with a coworker about walking to school in the California fog. We were explaining it to another coworker who lived in a place that rarely if ever had fog. It's so strange thinking of fog as water and air. Two things we must have; yet in this situation it causes confusion at best and disasterious wrecks at worst. Well, I'm up in the middle of the night because I'm in a bit of a fog.
I want to be able to make black/white choices but all around me I see only various shades of grey.
I know that there is only One who can show me clarity in this fog. He is the source of peace and rest on this sleepless night. I must say that I look forward with great anticipation and joy for the opportunity to sit at the feet of His prophets and apostles this weekend. I have faith that my questions will be answered. I know that there are others like me anxiously waiting for the spiritual feast that awaits. It is
my prayer that I will come to the feast hungry and prepared to try it all. I know that if I exercise my faith the fog will lift and I will be given direction and determination. So many analogies in life can be made of Him who loves us. On this night, He is the lighthouse in the fog of my mind and heart.

A rarity

I found myself wishing for something few desert rats wish for. . .
HEAT!

See where I live swamp coolers and A/C units run from April to November. Because our winters are mild most don't turn on the heat. That being said, our blood is "thinner" and many of us feel cold during the "winter" months. I froze my dear Mr. Website Guy out all winter so we can turn on the air more often this summer.

Well, at work I was feeling chilly and suddenly I found myself longing for the heat of desert summers. I love the feeling of leaving an air conditioned building and getting into my ovenbaked car and feeling the hot air "prickle" my face. I get to thaw out. Seriously I wear warm clothes in the summer to the office because my liitle office is a box. An icebox. I don't get to ask for a temp change because I'm on one of the main duct for my floor. So I take beaks and go bask inthe beautiful sunshine.

Many of my fellow desert dwellers would say I was crazy for feeling this way and would probably be upset if my wish for early heat came true. It makes me a rarity but hey I'm a rose that blossoms in the desert. I love it! Thanks Mr. website Guy for giving up your dream of working in rainy Redmond, WA. I love you and I love where we live. Thanks.

So, my dear Reader, if you hear my neighbors complaining of an unusually early start to the heat, willyou keep my wish come true a secret? Thanks!

Turning Points

We all have those pivotal moments in life where we see a glimpse of ourselves  through the eyes of another. You know when those around you love you enough to tell you "like it is".  We then have a choice. We can evaluate and confirm or we can bristle and deny. I think the moment we do the evaluating we have a moment called a "turning point". It's a moment where we can later pinpoint the time of change. 

Toostie's had two turning points of late and a third one recently popped up. The first two were in regard to my weight and my use of certain words. The third was pointed out to me by my boss. After a staff meeting, we all sat around for rare visit filled with laughter and teasing. As I parted from the jovial meeting, my boss said to my coworker, "she's so pretty when she smiles." I returned to deliver a message and was told of the comment. I replied with a thank you and a question. "Do I not smile enough?" I was told I don't.  

So, I've thought about it and I'm going to take action. It'll be conscious effort for a while but just like exercise and eating, and pausing before speaking, it'll get easier with time and will only do me good. If you want to share with Tootsie things that'll make me smile please do. I'll be sure to share with you, too. I hope there will come a time when others say I smile "all the time". We all know someone like that and it's so refreshing. So, what kind of turning points have you had lately?      

Simply Simplify

I spent the weekend building an addition on to my closet. I did this because Tootsie's duds are out of control everywhere in her house. I also went through the closet and decided there are some contents which simply don't belong anymore. They have no place in my life, so off they go to the thrift store. I got to thinking that feels so good, I need to do this in other areas of my house and in my life. I need to simply simplify. What do I need all this baggage for? It's just extra fuel in the tragic event of a house fire. I'm going to slim down. Physically as well as domestically. I think it will help me bulk up spiritually and mentally. That's where the extra stuff really matters. How about you? What do you want to simply simplify in your life? Good luck getting slimmer!